It is with great pride and humility that we here at youareadirtywhore.com bring you the very first in what we hope to be a long running series of Dirty Whore Interviews. Thankfully, when we contacted the lovely and talented Jessica Drake, someone had just recently hit her over the head with a blunt object, and in her confusion, she agreed to actually do an interview with us. Besides receiving numerous AVN and XRCO nominations and awards for her work as an adult film actress, Jessica has appeared in Premiere, Variety, V Magazine, Chord, and Stuff magazines, been profiled on HBO’s “Pornucopia,” Showtime's "Family Business", done radio interviews with metal legends Anthrax, danced on-stage with Kid Rock, worked on the FOX TV series Skin, appeared on G4's "Attack Of The Show," made a legendary appearance at 2005 Grammy Awards, and been featured on Late Night with David Letterman, MTV, VH1, and The E! Channel. Most importantly, she is truly a down-to-earth, nice and funny person. You can check out her film work at wickedpictures.com, and check out some awesome photos and find out when she might be in your area at jessicadrake.com. Without further adieu, the Jessica Drake Interview:

Full Name: jessica drake

Hometown: San Antonio, TX

Measurements: 34D-24-34

Thong, G-String or Commando: commando, always.

Bikini or 1-piece?: no thanks! see above.

I've Never Been Able To: say no to slick interviewers

If you had to to choose one or the other, would you rather have to walk everywhere and at all times on your hands and knees for 1 year, or drink a beet, carrot, and spam shake for every meal with no snacks allowed between meals for 1 year?: have you seen me crawl?? i'd stick to that for a year. hell, i do it almost all the time anyway!

What is Pi?: a mathematical formula having to do something with circumferences of circles?

Your favorite pie: fur!

Why does the caged bird sing?: it wants out

Why does Winger think anyone actually wants to hear him sing ever again? who's winger?

Which 80's TV character would you rather do: Grossman from CHiP's, Tattoo from Fantasy Island, or Natalie from The Facts of Life? natalie, for sure. i'd give her an extreme ho makeover.

Who let the dogs out? yes.

What's in your refrigerator right now? everything needed to cook about 3 or 4 days of gourmet meals. and yes, I'm doing the cooking, smart-ass.

What won't Meatloaf do for love? dress like a woman. oh, wait, I guess he would.

Worst pick-up line ever laid on you: 'oh! that shirt is very becoming on you! Of course, if I were on you, I'd be CUMMING too!'

What super-hero power would you like to have and why?:        I'd like to be invisible. I'd love to see what guys really do when women aren't around. that and I'd constantly start sneaking up on people & having sex with them!

What's your opinion on the BCS?: the what?? sorry, insert dumb blonde joke here.

Who is full of more BS; a politician or a guy trying to get in your pants?: a politician- at least i know the agenda of the guy trying to get into my pants!

Best way to get in your pants: tell me I'm beautiful & pull my hair.

Best way to get in my pants: you're wearing pants at this point?? what's wrong with you?

Best way for both of us to get in the same pair of pants: crowbar

Who's the biggest Dirty Dirty Whore and why?: GWB... I know I'm from texas & I'm genetically predisposed to like him, but I feel it's the general consensus of most americans nowadays.

And finally, our signature question: Are you a dirty whore? ok, I'll admit... I moonlight as a dirty whore... but a smart one. ; )